If you have low self-esteem, confidence can seem like something you’ll never get. However, there is a major secret to all confident women out there… None of them were born that way. In fact, they’ve worked really, really hard to become confident and resilient. Fancy giving it a go? Here are some starters from some of our favourite confident women out there.
They embrace failure
“Failure is an important part of your growth and developing resilience. Don’t be afraid to fail” - Michelle Obama
Don’t be afraid to fail at something, instead, use that failure to see how you can improve next time. It’s a life lesson, not something to be ashamed of – and all confident women have definitely had a fail at some point in their life.
They’re comfortable in their own skin
“You look how you look. Be comfortable. What are you going to do? Be hungry every single day to make other people happy? That’s just dumb.” - Jennifer Lawrence
Confident women have learnt to love the body they’re in. Yes, this isn’t easy, but being on a constant diet isn’t either… If you need some help in this department, follow some of the many body positivity Instagrammers out there for a daily of inspiration. Our faves include @bodyposipanda, @i_weigh, @laurathomasphdand @nerdabouttown
They don’t apologise – unless they’re wrong
“I’m tough, I’m ambitious, and I know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch, OK.” — Madonna
How many times a day do you utter the word sorry? Way too many we’re betting. As women, we’re programmed to apologise for everything, even when we didn’t do something wrong. Confident women don’t apologise when asking for a pay rise. They don’t apologise for saying no to something. In fact, the only time they’ll say sorry is when they genuinely mean it. Try it today – it’s pretty darn empowering.
They look after themselves
“I remind myself to be kind to myself, and as slightly ridiculous as it may sound, to treat myself in the same gentle way I’d want to treat a daughter of mine. It really helps.”— Emma Stone
Self-care is super important for feeling more balanced. It’s easier to have compassion for others, but you need to treat yourself kindly if you want to feel better about life and become more confident - so don’t feel bad about booking in that manicure or a night out with friends, these are the things that all help on our journey to confidence!
They do things their way
“If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun.” — Katharine Hepburn
Following the herd is the safe option. Women who are strong and successful make their own rules and follow their own path. If you want to take up tap dancing, do it? Don’t let your friends or family tell you that you can’t.
They change what they can… and don’t moan about what they don’t
“If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.” — Maya Angelou
Confident women have the desire and energy to change those things in their life that they are not happy with. Making a life that gives you happy joy is a major step to confidence, however, there are often things you can’t change – an angry boss, a long commute, an interfering in-law. Moaning about those things doesn’t help anyone and just engulfs you in negativity – instead, make like a confident woman would do and change your attitude instead. That angry boss may be going through something awful at home, the long commute allows you to read and the interfering in-law is just trying to help…
They have mentors
“Surround yourself with people and things that inspire you. Learn everything you can” — Jameela Jamil
While you can do a lot of work yourself on gaining self-esteem and confidence, most strong women don’t do it alone. They surround themselves with people they can learn from and feel inspired by. Whether that’s a boss at work, a group of positive friends or a life coach, find someone who will support you and help you grow.
They master their fears
“The key to my success has always been that my desire to succeed has always been greater than my fear. I’ve been scared to death about a lot of things, but then I think, ‘Okay, you gotta buckle up, girl. You’ve got yourself here, so get out there and just do it.’ — Dolly Parton
Yep, even confident women like Dolly are scared of things, but what do they do about it? They don’t run away that’s for sure, but they face their fears. Try it yourself one day. What happens usually is that whatever you were scared of is never really that bad, plus facing that fear gives you a hole heap of – you’ve guessed it – confidence!